Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Montgomery Street Cafe

Do you have a pair of boots, a sweet vest and need breakfast? If so, admission is free to Montgomery Street Cafe. Since its by the Will Rogers Coliseum, you can have breakfast but if you're wearing a polo shirt, plaid shorts and boat shoes, you might want to just keep on moving there...pardner.

The Cafe has been around since 1949. What else happened in 1949 you ask? Why would you ask that? I talk about food, not history. But I'll indulge you. There was the great flood, of course. The Cats finished in first place in the Texas League with 100 wins. And Cowboys and Horse-men finally had a place to get breakfast on the west side of Fort Worth.

The Cafe definitely has a feeling of being too busy serving food to catch up to 2008 and that's just fine with me. There are original old refrigerators, original decorations and original waitresses. The people that come in seem like the same people you would find if you wandered into a small cafe/diner anywhere west of Weatherford. This is definitely a small town cafe in a large city.

....Time for a side story....

My buddies and I used to always stop into Jean's Feed Barn in Cross Plains, Texas when travelling and we would always order the homemade pies (presumably made by Jean). They were delicious and we always made a big production of how much we liked the pies. One time, four of us stopped in on a Friday afternoon and were probably the highlight of the restaurant with our quick wit and handsome looks. We were four yuppie law students, dressed like we think we belong in West Texas, and we were eating pie and drinking tea. Anyways, we all left amongst laughter shared with our waitress and good memories in our pockets. The last words out of our mouths were, "We'll see you on Sunday on our way back through so have some new pie for us." At about the thirty mile mark from Cross Plains, somebody looked up and said:
"Hey, did you tip?"
"No, I thought you did."
"I thought you did."
So, not only had we taken over a restaurant with our obnoxiousness, we walked out without tipping and we made a point of reminding them that we would be back. They were definitely waiting for us. On Sunday, we entered with trepidation as all eyes fell on us. We sat down and a new waitress came over. The usual small town charm was lost. Something had to be done. The four of us jumped towards the kitchen where our waitress was mentally gutting us and explained our story and paid her a few hundred dollars (or twenty) and quickly made amends. We had a good laugh about it then, but I'm sure that had we delayed any longer, we would have gotten some of Jean's saliva in our mashed potatoes.
Why did I just tell you that story. Because that was the first thought when I entered Montgomery Street Cafe. In other words. Don't piss off a waitress here because she will remember it next time you come in.

On to the food. I went for breakfast (as all good cowboys do) and ordered the breakfast special: two eggs, bacon or sausage, hashbrowns or grits and biscuits and gravy. The food was your typical cafe food. But you don't go to a cafe for fine dining. You go for grease, like a real man. You also go for the bottomless cup of coffee. This is an important test for a cafe. Is your coffee cup constantly being filled? If so, you're at the right place. And to be fair, I think you could wear whatever you wanted and nobody would look twice. I will go with the yellow polo, plaid shorts and boat shoes and report back to you.

Overall, this is a unique experience in the realm of Fort Worth breakfast places. Go to Ol' South or Paris to see and be seen. Go to Montgomery Street Cafe to eat breakfast and wonder where in the world somebody is coming from in Fort Worth, that they need actual spurs. Seriously, three sets...in one morning. Two miles from downtown. That's awesome. And that is one of the things that makes Fort Worth so cool.

Thanks for the recommendation of Montgomery Street Cafe. I will definitely go back but I have to get spurs first.

Montgomery Street Cafe on Urbanspoon

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Whoohooo - 50,000 Posts!!!

Did you see that? It went by pretty quickly.

Thanks to everybody who keeps reading despite my occassional lags in posting. Its an honor to know that 50,000 people have read this blog (yes, thats a joke). Thanks for reading and all of the comments so far. I hope you'll stick around for another 50K.

Remember, if you have any suggestions, comments, or just need an anonymous e-buddy I can be reached at fortworthholeinthewall@yahoo.com

-FortWorthHoleInTheWall

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Granny's Tacos

Are you on the north side of the Fort? Are you dressed in a suit and obviously out of place? Let me tell you where to go.

You might be at a hole in the wall if: the restaurant is obviously not in a place designed for a restaurant; you questioned whether or not to go into a place because you're just not sure what's in there; the place only takes cash. I think this place meets all hole in the wall requirements.

Granny's Tacos is on Long, east of Main and appears to be an old garage. But don't be mislead, there isn't nearly as much space inside as you would imagine for a garage. In fact, the actual area for diners is about three feet by ten feet.

When you walk into Granny's, you'll notice a nice lady behind a counter (Not-Granny), a grill to one side, hot refried beans, potatoes, and meat to the other side, a bowl of flour dough behind her and a picture of what I presume is Granny. That's it. No tables. No chairs. You probably shouldn't stay very long anyways.

Order the taco. Just one. If you're thinking, "I'm a big man/pregnant woman, I need two tacos." You have no idea how wrong you are. You are obviously too caught up in your greatness.

After you've ordered ("Can I have one taco? Please don't stab me sir.") the magic begins. Not-Granny will then pull off a piece of the dough, roll it out on the table that would probably make most health inspectors (and wusses) cringe. She then tosses the tortilla on the stove top and lets it cook. After its cooked, she piles refried beans, potato and meat into the tortilla and you're set.

When I went, they had shredded pork roast. I had never had this before and now I know why there has been this emptiness in my life. It was for pork roast in tacos.

On Fridays enchiladas are also available. According to Not-Granny, 12:30 is too late to get enchiladas. She runs out soon. Which means one of two things. Either she makes three enchiladas and eats them herself. Or they are the greatest thing known to man and you have to get there by noon to get them. I'm going with the latter because I live in a fantasy world.

According to the man behind me, they really are good and I should try to get there earlier next time. I would believe him. He seemed like somebody in the know. You know what I mean.

So Not-Granny finished my taco and asked if I wanted hot sauce. Of course I said yes. But then I saw that the hot sauce container was only a third full. What is this? Some sort of gringo scam? "Give me more salsa" I demanded. Although I probably said, "can I get another please?" She looked at me, knowing I knew nothing about this small package of demon sauce. Its hot. Like, just a dab will do...if you're stripping paint from a battleship. So don't pour it on your taco. Just dip.

The total cost for this experience and massive taco was five dollars. You can buy a Jarrito, some Horchata, or other items. Apparently they also have cake. But the one rule is that you must pay in cash. The taco was enough for me, so I took it and headed home (where I conveniently keep a stash of Jarritos).

How was the taco you ask? Why are you even asking that? I just told you there was a freshly made flour tortilla, hot refried beans, warm strips of potato and pork roast piled high. Plus I had a Jarrito (Fresa, in case you were interested). How could this be a bad meal? It couldn't . I have no doubt that it was better than whatever you had that day. After I scooped off the salsa I poured on, it was even better. The salsa was delicious, but it was way too spicy for me, in that quantity.

Next time, I may eat at the picnic table outside. But I probably wont. Especially if I'm dressed in a suit again.

Check out Granny's Tacos if you get a chance. The tacos are huge, the ambiance is wonderful, you get to watch Not-Granny make you a tortilla, and this place truly is a hole in the wall. What more could you ask for? I'll tell you, more enchiladas. That's what I would ask for. You know they're good. Let me know if you've had them.

Thanks to Sam for the recommendation. Let me know if you've been and disagree so that I can practice deleting comments. Hahaha, mostly just kidding...

Also, thanks to Fort Worth Weekly's Chow, Baby for the mention in this week's article. I would imagine this is the first and last time you see this blog's name in print outside of the indictment.

Granny's Tacos on Urbanspoon

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Holidays, Friends, Family, Food

The holiday season is fast approaching and that means one thing - visitors. But what do you do when your home is filled with family and friends from out-of-town and they get hungry? You take them out to one of the many fine Fort Worth establishments. As part of my required community service I am going to provide you with an exhaustive schedule of restaurants to take your visitors to, so that they get the full Fort Worth Experience (patent pending).

Below are three "weekends of food", which takes into account that some restaurants are not open on certain days. I have also provided options, based on price.

Option 1 - Jobless College Friends Come to Town/Family You Don't Like Enough To Spend Money On

Friday Dinner: Fred's. Get a burger and sit and watch a concert. Or walk down the street to any number of bars. In a year, you'll be able to walk to all the big new developments on West 7th.

Saturday Breakfast: Paul's for Doughnuts. They're cheap, its in a cool building, and for the family you don't like, its a great place to leave them. The drive to Paul's will give everybody something to talk about as you pass through the area just south of Downtown and the revitalized Magnolia area.

Saturday Lunch: Carshons. A greasy sandwich will hit the spot for most of your college friends who had a good time Friday night. For your family, there is pie. Pie brings families together.

Saturday Post-Lunch or Lunch Replacement:  Go to the Rahr Brewery.  They always have food on Saturday afternoons from 1-3 and you can get in and drink for only $7. 
Saturday Dinner: Fuzzy's. Queso, Tacos, Beer - $10. Kids will enjoy watching their mom and dad get drunk. Friends will enjoy the cheap food and drinks. Wear a purple shirt and you can pretend you're a TCU student.

Sunday Breakfast: Ol' South. There will be a crowd, but wait through it. Make all of your friends get the German Pancakes. Half of them wont like it but you never liked them anyways.

Sunday Lunch: Mama's Pizza. Send your guests off with a great pizza and get yourself a beer to celebrate a weekend accomplished.

Option 2 - You and your Yuppie friends who have some money but aren't the $30K Millionaires from east of here.

Friday Dinner: Joe T's. Get a pitcher of margaritas and a stack of cups and wait in line patiently. Weather permitting, sit outside and get the fajitas. I know many of you dislike the food but the fajitas wont kill you. Besides, its the atmosphere that you're going for. After you're done, have the designated driver take you to downtown and have a good time.

Saturday Breakfast: You're a yuppie, admit it. Go to Taverna for brunch. It's good.

Saturday Late Lunch: Kincaid's. Saddle up to the old deli counter and everybody should order a bacon cheeseburger but then split fries or onion rings. Save some room for dinner.

Saturday Dinner: Cafe Piola. It's disgustingly cute in its old house. Order a bottle of wine and enjoy your lengthy dinner. If you try to find Piola and get lost, just go back to Camp Bowie and head down to Winslow's Wine Cafe.

Sunday Breakfast: Ol' South. I know, I mentioned this one earlier, but this works for all kinds. Don't turn your nose up at the coffee...you snob.

Sunday Lunch: Spiral Diner. "Oh look how adventurous we are!" Who needs meat, right?

Option 3 - Your Wealthy Parents or In-laws

Friday Dinner: Lili's Bistro - Great dinner menu with fancy selections, wine, and dessert for your dearly beloved family to pay for. Plus its got a cool interior.

Saturday Breakfast: Vidalia's - Malt Vanilla pancakes, sweet potatoes with gravy, etc. They need your business and you need their southern charm in the morning.

Saturday Lunch: Cooper's.  It's BBQ in the Stockyards.  It's pricey, and you can kill many hours of mindless questions all while drinking a cold beer and eating some delicious BBQ.  Plus, afterwards you can walk around the stockyards and amaze your family with all the touristy stuff they really wanted to see.
Saturday Dinner: Reata. Its probably cliche, but you have to go to Reata. It's not the most expensive place in town but its a classic. You can talk about James Dean and explain how Reata used to be at the top of the Tower before the Tornado attacked Fort Worth. Try to do dinner on the rooftop if you can. They'll love it and you more.

Sunday Brunch: The Modern. Skip breakfast and go for brunch. The food here is fantastic and her parents will think you're a classy upstanding citizen. Until you take them here, they assume you're a dolt who is wasting their daughter's time. Trust me.


There you go. Some of my favorites have been left off, but I tried to give a variety of options. Let me know if you've got any changes you would make.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Fuego

Note:  Since this review, Fuego has closed.  Jake's on Camp Bowie is now in its place.

The best thing about hole in the walls is the low key, local nature of the restaurants. Local cooks who grew up in the area and know the area and their customers like their own family.

Fuego is this type of place. Except current owner, Efrain Benitez is from Mexico and until this year, has lived in Chicago. So its similar, but not at all. According to the Fuego website, however, Efrain moved his family here after purchaing Duce from Chef Tim Love and renaming it Fuego. So we've got him now.

Fuego is the uspcale restaurant that is otherwise known as the reincarnation of Duce. Duce was Chef Tim Love's attempt to conquer the wild west (side of Fort Worth). As my loyal readers know, I have the utmost respect for Iron Chef Tim Love, so I will assume the problems he had with Duce were based on all of you and not him. Fuego and Duce are both the type of restaurant that many people assume only "those" people go to. You know what I mean. People that pay a lot for food and like to sip obscure drinks and airily laugh about the plights of the upper middle class' attempt to afford real luxury vehicles. Or $30,000 millionaires. Well hold on to your seats for a shock.

Fuego is right on Camp Bowie between the Lunch Box and Baker Brothers. The entrance is fairly unassuming, but remember what they say about unassuming - don't make a nass out of yourself, go in. Inside, the restaurant has a clean modern appearance and seems like the place to be on weekend evenings. In the back of the inside portion, there is a lounge type area with lots of casual seating and a fireplace that looks out to the patio. Thats right, the patio. There's an outdoor patio with a cover, heaters and fans. It looks like it could be used most of the year around.

But the best part is actually the food. Lunch time permits the cheaper of us to enjoy fine dining at a discount. I had the West Side Chicken which is two pieces of pan fried chicken on top of a mixed weed salad and feta cheese. Although this sounds insubstantial and similar to something one of "those" people would eat. I assure you that you are wrong. I'm not one of "those" people and its actually a ridiculous amount of food. The weed salad has a light dressing and is plenty of food for a side to the chicken. The chicken was perfectly cooked and had a great flavor that reminded me of that time I ate at that Mexican Chef's place in Chicago....wait....

Chef Benitez describes his food as Continental Cuisine with a Mediterranean flair. For those of you that remember my penchant for apple-tinis, you can guess that flair goes a long way with me. He spells flair as "flare" though. Which is probably a play on Fuego. So, before making a joke about people who are flaring or otherwise on fire, I'll move on.

Did you get the subtle joke above?

Anyways, the food here is delicious and at lunch is fairly affordable. Not, one option a day, dirty table hole in the wall. But really good food from a high quality chef, with substantial portions cheap. If you are looking for a place that has great food, with a wide variety of options and need to impress the lady of your life, this would be a good place to go. If you have a friend that owes you lunch, this is a good place to go. However, if you're one of "those" type of people, don't go here. You wont like it. You should go to Dallas. Seriously. Leave.

Check out Fuego. This is a great place for Fort Worth and we need to let Chef Benitez know we want more of his kind here (chefs, that is). Go at lunch for a substantially cheaper menu. I'll put his website up on the side. Over there - - - ->

Fuego on Urbanspoon